Coming Home
by Hota
Summary: Dean and Cas go for a weekend away, but things have been tense and only get worse when the car breaks down on the way.


**A/N:** Written for the DCMiniBang - prompt was "Fireplace"

 **Coming Home**

Dean cursed as the car sputtered and died, dragging to a halt half-way up the hill. He squinted at the familiar red engine light popping up on the dash before turning to stare at Castiel. "I thought you got this fixed?"

Cas winced, staring out the window at the heavy snow falling around them. "I didn't have time."

Didn't have time. That seemed to be the running excuse with them lately. No time for going out, for eating dinner together, sharing a morning cup of coffee, certainly no time for sex. He may have been hoping, selfishly, that coming out to the cabin for a weekend, cut off from their daily lives, would result in them rekindling the passion between them. Now he was wondering if maybe it was too late, if maybe the universe was trying to give them a sign.

He sighed and unbuckled, squirming his way back into his coat.

Castiel looked over with a frown. "What are you doing?"

Dean pulled his gloves on before responding. "Fixing your damn car."

"It's freez-"

Castiel's words were cut off as he shut the door behind him, hissing at the sharp bite of cold that attacked his face. It _was_ freezing, and due to only get colder. Snow fell in lazy, heavy clumps, coating his hair and shoulders in moments. The only reprieve he found was the quickly fading warmth of the engine as he popped the hood.

He knew the problem was something he couldn't fix, not without proper parts and a few hours to spare, but he was hoping a few minutes cooling down would at least act like a temporary fix. Not unlike his hope for their relationship. Maybe he was hoping for too much if they couldn't even finish an argument. The all-out fights they'd had through the past ten or so years hadn't been pleasant, but at least when all was said and done, they'd been back on equal footing. They'd known where they stood with each other and moved on. He'd take that over this drawn out silence any day, but he didn't know how to stop turning away.

When had things gotten so complicated?

Dean tensed when he heard the passenger door open, the car shifting before it shut. He expected Castiel to try and have another heart-to-heart, but then he heard the trunk open and he realized it'd been almost a month since the last one. He straightened and looked around the car in time to see Cas slinging his bag over his shoulder, small suitcase in the other hand, before slamming the trunk. "Where are you going?"

"The cabin."

"It's at least a twenty minute walk." Dean curled his hand into a fist when Cas didn't even look at him, wanting to grab him and shake him and demand to know what the hell was going on with them. Cas wasn't angry; he knew that much with the way Cas at least answered.

He leaned back over the engine, soaking up the lingering heat, staring at it without really seeing anything. In all the time he'd been with Cas, he couldn't remember a time they'd been so at odds with each other. They'd had each other's backs since grade school, ever since Dean told off the bully who'd been making Cas' life hell. By middle school they were inseparable. In high school they'd both dated a few other people until a nasty fight fueled by jealousy on both sides made them realize who they really wanted. They'd been together ever since.

Dean pulled back with a sigh, closing the hood and retrieving his own bags from the trunk. He grabbed the cooler and bags of food that would last them through the weekend, hoping they'd have enough if they ended up stranded. The snow was falling harder now, blanketing the ground in solid white that reflected the glow of the full moon. Cas' footprints were all but erased, though he didn't need them to find the cabin. There was only one road and it would be hours yet before the snow covered it completely.

He was sweating and shivering by turns by the time he reached the cabin, breaths coming hard and quick from the frigid air and exertion. He kicked the door shut and gritted his teeth at the lack of light inside.

"The generator's out."

 _No shit, Sherlock._ Dean sighed and kicked snow off his boots, making it another few steps inside before dropping everything he was carrying into the hall. He caught the glow of a fire as he passed the entrance to the living room. At least there was firewood.

He found the closet and fished out a flashlight, cursing when he found the batteries dead. "God _damn_ , can't Gabriel keep anything in working order?" He chucked the useless flashlight into the wall of the closet, sucking in a few quick breaths as he gripped the doorframe. The entire month was certainly shaping up to an amazingly _fucking_ grand time. Why wouldn't his chance of rectifying things turn out just as spectacularly?

He glanced up as a bright orange glow moved towards him, squinting at Cas as he held out a glow stick, one of the new LED emergency sticks they'd gotten for both their cars. His fingers brushed against Cas' when he reached out to take it and he sucked in a breath when Cas flinched away and let go, turning back to the living room and warmth of the fire.

Dean stared at the empty shadows as he tried to tell himself it had only been a trick of the light. The thought that maybe Cas was angry with him, infuriated to the point he didn't even want to be touched, cut through Dean deeper than anything had in a long time, not since his mother's death. He stood there, paralyzed with the fear that he might be losing Cas, the one constant left in his life outside of his brother. The only thing keeping him calm right then was knowing they were stranded here for the moment, so he turned his attention to the one thing he might be able to fix.

He wasn't at all surprised when even after cleaning the carburetor, the generator remained dead and lifeless. And of course there were no spare parts to switch out. Why should his luck take a turn for the better now? He slumped against the wall, rubbing at his face before deciding to make the best of… whatever he could.

The cooler was still where he left it. He took it and the food to the table. He found the sanitizer wipes Cas kept on hand to clean up, using the LED glow to make a sandwich. He wasn't hungry, but he remembered Cas commenting on his lack of lunch in his rush to get out of work. He wrapped it in a napkin and grabbed a bottle of water, taking both to Cas where he sat on the floor in front of the fire.

Cas looked at the proffered food in surprise, tilting his head without looking up at Dean as he took it. "Thank you." He turned his attention back to the fire, holding the sandwich and water without tasting either.

Dean shifted on his feet, wanting to join Cas at the fire, but he felt like he would be intruding, so he packed the food back up and set it aside before heading for the door. Maybe a blast of cold would help.

"Where are you going?"

Dean glanced back to find Cas turned enough to look at him, sandwich still uneaten in his hand. "Check the car. Maybe it'll start now."

Cas hesitated before letting out a soft sigh. "It's freezing."

Like the cold shoulder was any better? "Not any colder than it is in here." Dean regretted the words the moment they left his mouth, watching Cas flinch again, dropping his gaze before turning back to the flames. He'd almost forgotten how good of a companion his foot was for his mouth. He let out a frustrated sigh and jerked his fingers through his hair, staring at the door before letting his head drop forward to thud against the wall. "What do you want me to do?"

The answering silence was deafening, broken only by the quiet snaps of burning wood. He started to think maybe Cas wouldn't answer and he'd be left standing there indefinitely when he finally answered, "I'd like you to want to stay."

Stay. That simple word sank deep and gave him hope that maybe things weren't as damaged between them as he feared. "Okay," he said, voice soft. He could do that. "Okay." He pulled his boots off, dropping them by the door and then found himself at a loss. There was no power, which meant the only source of both heat and light was the fire. The temperature outside was dropping steadily and, knowing Gabriel, the window in the main bedroom was still cracked.

He headed to the closet, finding the spare blankets and pillows, surprised to find they didn't smell like dust, but like they'd been washed in the past week. He dragged them back to the living room, shaking out a blanket and draping it around Cas' shoulders, noting he'd at least taken a bite of his sandwich. He tossed his jacket aside and sank down to sit next to Cas, stabbing at the flames with the poker as he searched for something to say. They hadn't sat and talked to each other in weeks. Longer, probably. It felt like ages.

"You've been distant." That certainly wasn't what he meant to say and this time it was his turn to wince as he felt Cas' eyes boring into him.

" _I've_ been distant?" He turned to face Dean and waited until he had Dean's full attention to continue. "I've tried talking to you, listening to you, giving you space. Hell, I've tried seducing you a dozen times over, and you still hardly look at me." Cas sucked in a breath and held it when his voice started to rise, visibly struggling to calm himself. His lips thinned into a line as he let his breath out through his nose. "I've been _right here, Dean_. Where were you?"

Dean flinched at having his own words from years ago thrown back at him. He never thought their situations would ever be reversed, that he would ever find himself being the one to pull away, especially not after struggling to keep Cas with him through that hell of a year.

He couldn't meet Cas' eyes, much less answer that, but now that it was in the open… "I'm sorry." He could have said it was stress from work, or stress from life itself, but he wasn't going to make excuses. "I've been trying to figure out what happened between us… Maybe it was just me being an ass."

"That sounds accurate." Cas didn't try to hide the bite to his words.

Dean gritted his teeth, biting the inside of his cheek. Chick-flick moments made his skin crawl, but Cas deserved that he at least try to get through this one. "I did suggest we come here so we could figure things out, you know. But then the car and the snow and everything else just made it seem like it wasn't meant to be."

Cas sighed. "Since when do you let the universe dictate your actions or goals?"

Dean laughed. It was weak, but at least it was a start. "Since I started feeling like I was losing one of my pillars, I guess."

"You're not losing me, Dean." Cas reached over, fingers hovering above Dean's a moment before wrapping around them and squeezing.

Dean clasped Cas' hand like a lifeline, giving it a tug and breathing a sigh of relief when Cas shifted closer, leaning into his side. "Cas," he murmured, shivering as he realized how long it had been since he'd said Cas' name just for the sake of saying it. When he felt the weight of Cas' head on his shoulder, he let his own drop down to rest on top, breathing in the familiar scent of Cas and his shampoo as they basked in the warmth of the fire.

And when Cas murmured his name in return, it felt like coming home.


End file.
